| 小夜鳴鳥 ( @ 2008-10-26 20:55:00 |
| Current mood: |
I don't know whether you know the situation or not, when you are talking in a language that is not your own and you usually suck at, and suddenly, out of nowhere, you're feeling your lips moving, hearing your voice talking, but that can't be possibly you talking that well. And your mind freezes in silent amazement, while your lips still go on talking on their own, and it sounds just great! Almost like you knew what you were talking about.
It's an amazing feeling, I can tell you. A bit disturbing as well, but who am I to complain? Okay, it wasn't that big of a conversation, I was just asking for a particular book in a bookstore, but I rarely managed to talk that fast and precisely without stuttering before, while I was even able to understand almost everything the bookseller replied, like I were totally used to talking Japanese.
Isn't it great?
Well, you may rest assured, that short period of euphoria didn't last for long. When I entered the small restaurant I'm sometimes eating at (fast, extremely cheap, nearest proximity, three very persuasive arguments, aren't they?) because I was too tired to do anything on my own once at home, I ordered a butadon (rice dish with pork slices on top) for take away.
They made me repeat my order thrice. I even showed them the picture on the menu to be sure. I told them it was a take away. They came with a steaming bowl of rice on a tray, along with a cup of hot tea instead.
Unfortunately, I forced myself hard not to show my foul mood all of a sudden, because I told myself that it had to have been me who wasn't clear enough, who used the wrong vocabulary etc., thus it had to be my fault and not theirs. And even though I was quite ready at that point to screw all logic and allow my nasty self to come out and play, I tried hard for my best smile when I sat down to eat. It wouldn't be that good an idea to be "that ill-mannered, arrogant foreigner" after all, not here, not now, not ever, and especially not in a restaurant I want to be able to go to another time... *sigh*